Soapbox

Maybe I am getting more conserative in my old age but this piece http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/26184891/vp/41291979#41291979 on the Today Show yesterday really made me think. While I appreciated Dr. Gail Saltz perspective on the implications of a single parent family on a child, I am still stewing over the idea that "Hollywood actresses are leading the way in showing that women don't need men to have a family". (Just on a technical note, in some form or another actually they do, at least initially.) And that these stars are considered role models, seriously? What is wrong with us that we are taking our moral and family cues from Hollywood actors? As a whole, a group known for a more "if it feels good, do it"approach to life. By and large these are not paragons of virtue (hello, Charlie Sheen). If you need an actor to look up to, at least be selective - what about Kirk Cameron? A devout Christian, he starred in a movie called Fireproof, which portrays a fightfighter who "never leaves his partner behind" but it is a different story at home. This film has been an inspiration to thousands on strengthening their marriages.

And that statistic that 39% of people think that marriage is obsolete...where was the representative from the 61% of people who believe in marriage and are fighting for it everyday? They could have talked to my parents who have made it 45 years together. And believe me, I know both of them - it was NOT easy. Where was the person like many of our own friends who have been right on the edge and have gone through years of trying times and heartbreak to get to the good place in their marriage that they are in now? This is not to say that all marriages can or should be able to make it - often there are circumstances that make it necessary. Malachi 2:16 reads, " 'I hate divorce,' says the God of Israel. God-of-the-Angel-Armies says, 'I hate the violent dismembering of the 'one flesh' of marriage.'"(The Message) This doesn't mean that God hates the people who divorce - what He hates is what happens to those people, all the hurt they go through. I am sure that some would tell you that it felt like a violent dismembering. And the ripple effect it has on the entire family - even in situations where the separated parties are as amiable as they can be, it still means that children, no matter what age, have to divide their time between their parents. Great lengths are gone to so that no one's feelings are hurt, but it still happens. My friend's son doesn't have both of his parents together in any of his wedding pictures. There is just so much pain, and it makes me so sad for anyone who is touched by divorce.

My rant here is not to condemn anyone. I just think we can find better role models and simply appreciate the Hollywood celebrities for the jobs they do, the performances they are paid to give. All too often we hear people in various states of life painfully testifying to the fact that "my dad was never around" and the impact that had on their lives. Makes me think about March of the Penguins and how much they go through to see that egg hatch - there is a reason there are two of them, they simply cannot do it alone. So what do we do? Make sure that you give all the love and support you can to the single parents in your life. Make sure that you do all you can to support marriage - your own or those of your friends and loved ones - because we know it isn't easy. But it is worth it. And I am quite sure that an institution meant to reflect the way that Christ loves the Church is not one that we want rendered obsolete.